Tag Archives: Friends

Almost normal. The struggle of going out.

Almost normal, like the life of everyone else.

Perhaps I shouldn’t be saying this, should I?

Mind and body playing tricky games with me lately, many of the things that should be on track are stuck, holidays are over, so the machine should be on full throttle right? Even here on the blog some posts should be already published by now, and they’re still pending… Inspiration, concentration, focus, energy, not very much on my side lately.

Now to the point.

Solitude, which turns into loneliness easily is something my psycho doc and my therapist have told me to strongly avoid. The latter has said: “don’t get locked at home, go out with some friends, to the movies, to museums, for a walk at a nice park…”. The idea is not bad at all, not so practical though: closer to where I live aside a few shopping malls there’s not much action, for that the Centro Historico (Downtown), Coyoacan or the areas between and close around from there are the way to go; talking about culture and art this area nearby is metaphorically speaking, dead really.

Not only that, I used to go to train rope access techniques one, two, or even three times weekly, the place is across the city from home, which can take, making use of suburban bus and subway, on the short, at least 1:45 hours, on the long, close to 3 hours!

I did it for years, never reluctantly, never feeling public transportation was not good enough for me, going training or other places, by myself.

Since late November 2016, for those who haven’t read about it here on this blog, when that bad depression and anxiety relapse came, the first months I remained locked at home with the exception of going with the doctor or the therapist, by car or with the aid of Uber once, just a few subway stations, picked up by friends and family on the way home. A couple of months later the idea of getting into the subway was still not pleasing at all, but I had to anyway.

Long before the darkest months, more than a year I think, taking the subway meant a small degree of uneasy, kind of anxious sensations, something to deal with… After the falling though it turned into a dark, confusing experience, a sordid trail. The long waits for the train to arrive, minute after minute after minute of facing somber thoughts and anxiety while surrounded, pushed, crushed by human masses, loud, really loud noises, the overwhelming load of people coming and going, chatting here and there, guys with huge loudspeakers selling “music”… unbearable cacophony…

Some degree of recovery has allowed me to go inside the dark alleys again but the fact is that getting in there is still not nice at all for me, so I try not to take the plunge that route. For months I’ve stayed at home most of the days, for me going out is a possibility of finding restlessness and exposing myself to very stressful moments, wether facing the city traffic while driving or making use of the “Metro” as we call Mexico City’s subway the sensory overload is something I’m not so used to anymore. In fact some have invited me to join them going making photos, to chat for a few hours or the like and I’ve had to decline more than once since the experience is not pleasing for me, nor is very healthy.

For long I’ve wanted to share this very short series of images of what that experience has been for me. I carry a camera almost everywhere I go, images are an easier way for me to communicate what I feel or think so I portrayed some of those anguishing moments months ago. The images are from February 2016.

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Into the depths (TBT)

For this throwback thursday I’d like to share this image from back in 2005. Some friends and I posing for the “before the adventure” shot previous to making the journey through the Chonta underground river in Guerrero, Mexico. The journey takes from six to eight hours of walking and swimming in the river that goes trough the cave, that can be achieved all at once, or trekking half of the distance, camping for a few hours, which we did on that occasion, and resuming the next day. It requires some physical effort, but it’s absolutely rewarding.

This was the second or perhaps the third time I went to trek the Chonta river, I really liked it and I came back there several times, but going there for the first time a couple of years before and my destiny was all set up. The experience of going so many hours into the dark, looking at the huge chambers inside the earth while floating in the river’s current lit only by our headlamps, witnessing the sheer power of the water, that stuck even really large tree trunks into the cave’s walls dozens of meters above the river’s level, and the excitement that back then was something really new for me, all of that drove me years later into learning and practicing much more serious caving.

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Recuerdos cibernéticos.

El contar con una vida “online ” de repente tiene sus ventajas. Hoy ya entrada la tarde recibí una notificación en Facebook en la que se me avisó que una amiga de Coahuila, Yesenia, había compartido una publicación mía.

Con la curiosidad despierta me pregunté, de lo más reciente, qué es lo que habría sido de su interés para haber tenido la delicadeza de compartirlo, para sorpresa mía se trató de una fotografía que hice de ella, su hermana y su prima en una visita que hicieron acá a la Ciudad de México en 2011!

El recuerdo de ese día en que conocí personalmente a tres bellas norteñas con las que compartí buenos momentos dibujó una sonrisa en mi rostro. Sólo por el gusto hice una versión de la foto dándole un toque del paso del tiempo, como un breve llamado a la nostalgia.

  

Campamento, Sótano, pozas de agua fría, fotos, brindis y fiesta en Zongolica Veracruz: Popoca 2014

Lo prometido es deuda, y repartiendo el tiempo en mil y un cosas, entre rato y rato pude completar la galería de imágenes de la reunión de amigos montañistas en Zongolica de la que escribí brevemente en la publicación anterior de este blog.

En los tres días, además de bajar el sótano, experiencia que por sí sola vale muchísimo la pena, tuve el gran placer de saludar a muchos amigos de hace ya tiempo, convivir con nuevos amigos, hacer un paseo fotográfico, con todo y chapuzón en las frescas, por no decir heladas pozas del río que se lanza al abismo en el sótano, pasar una tarde de relax con un buen vino tinto y vodka (eh Luis!), y como cereza del pastel, divertirme con las ocurrencias de todos en la fiesta, con elección de Reina de Popoca y todo! En la galería incluyo momentos de todo esto, ah y una inclusión de un avistamiento muy inusual de tres “sirenos” en las orillas de Orizaba, una ciudad cercana a Zongolica, y donde hicimos una escala en nuestro retorno a la Ciudad de México.

Espero la disfruten!